Harriet Posnak Lesser does it again. Here, she teaches, in her own inimitable way, the art of small talk. (And, small talk or not, may I just say that HPL is no slouch in the conversation department. We can talk on any subject in the world for hours on end. Just sayin’.) – Melody Lesser
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(Very) Small Talk by Harriet Posnak Lesser
Do you avoid social situations? Do you lack the verbal skills needed to make fascinating chit chat? Are you afraid of coming across as a conversational clown, an idiomatic idiot? Relax. Like everything else in this era of downsizing, language has been reduced to a bare minimum. Now anyone can be an attention getter. All you need are four key expressions — “You know,” “Just sayin’,” “Not so much,” and “#Hashtag …” Here’s how it works:
You’re at your high school reunion and you run into an old classmate. She was leader of the “in” crowd while you were a definite “outie.” She’s put on a few pounds but still looks great. Panic reigns until you remember the magic words.
“Oh it’s you,” she says. “What have you been up to?”
“Not so much,” you say.
“Your yearbook ambition was to be a famous singer. Well, did you make it?”
“#Hashtag Barbra Streisand.”
“Get out! I can’t believe it. Do you know Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus?”
“And #hashtag Pharrell.”
“Bazinga! Can I get tickets to your next concert? I’ll bet it’s one of those big star-studded events.”
“You know. #hashtag Justin Timberlake.”
“Who’d have thought the girl voted `Most Likely Not to Succeed’ would grow up to be a show biz legend.”
“Not so much.”
“Don’t be modest. What’s it like to have the world at your feet and the confidence to go where no man or woman has gone before.”
“#Hashtag William Shatner.”
“By the way, do you still hear from that nerdy guy you used to date? I remember when he showed up for football tryouts in a tennis outfit — or was it scuba diving gear?”
“I married him. #Hashtag Bill Gates. Just sayin’.”
copyright 2014 Harriet Posnak Lesser
ABOUT HARRIET POSNAK LESSER
Harriet Posnak Lesser is an award-winning journalist and social satirist whose articles have appeared in Long Island’s The South Shore Record and Nassau Herald, The New York Times, Cracked Magazine and others.
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